What activities do you lose yourself in?
My grandfather told me about the man who sat naked in a barrel finding himself in the truest freedom. Now I considered how I might lose mysef ? I am not entrely covinced by the sitting in a barrel naked. Freedom it may be but I wonder practically how much fun freedom really is, well that sort anyway. I wondered about the times where I lose myself and ordinarily I think it has been in personal relationships. This is not the greatest positive I can think of, it is however true. From the very first romantic relationship I had, Ilost something of myself in it. Like my needs were not prioritised, were not important. The lack of respect chipped away at my identity, my sense of who I was. The creativitiy, my theatre, music and fun activities were all curtailed to fit in around the romantic relatioships, that all in there own way ended in violence, or coercion of some sort. It was not a great way to get lost. ow Idont really like that feeling. Even losing myself in a film or a book is difficult. Its like giving up something of me, my personal time and thoughts and creativity and activities to someone else. I learnt that I like to feel present, in the moment. Not lost, in any moment or activity. Except in writing. An activity where I can lose sense of time and place, lost in the words, lost to the world, but not lost to myself, it is the greatest joy in my life.